Japanese Brides — Meet Japanese Mail Order Brides

Most likely, you’re here because you want to find a Japanese mail order bride. Most likely, you’re tired of fake dating apps, guides that don’t lead you anywhere, and videos from tourists who’ve been living in Tokyo for 1 week and now feel like experts.

Well, that’s not what you’ll find here. In this guide, we’ll cover all the most important topics about these ladies: stereotypes, concepts, views, values, and so on. We’ll also explain where to meet them, why offline dating won’t work for you, and how much you’ll have to pay for it.

So if you want to find a bride, continue reading.

Facts to know before getting a Japanese bride: Good, bad, all of it

Are they really that perfect? Well, no. Just like any other nation, Japanese are different. For some, a Japanese woman will be a perfect wife while for others, marrying a lady from Tokyo would result in a nightmare.

Let’s talk about some of their character traits.

• They’re calm and respectful. That’s how their concept of “Wa” (harmony) affects their lives—it’s all about peace and social conformity. Their personal interests are not as important as harmony and silence (which is not viewed as uncomfortable there, unlike in most Western countries).
• Some, however, say they’re only calm and respectful in public places only. Some say that they have double standards and “different faces” for different situations. Which is, well, not 100% false—but it doesn’t mean your Japanese will lie to you or cheat on you. Just don’t expect her public “face” (kao) to be her true self. You’ll see her real emotions sooner or later and it should not be a bad surprise for you—in fact, it means that she can finally fully trust you.
• They cherish traditional values. Well, what we want to say here is that Japan tends to hold traditional views more than other developed countries—in Japanese families, for example, it’s a woman who is responsible for raising children. However, Japanese mail order brides are obviously not as conservative as women from other regions of Asia (Southeast Asia, for instance).
• They are cute and feminine—their society still has certain traditional expectations for them, but it’s not only a social thing. Not only their behavior is feminine but also their “charm”, their style, and the way they dress and speak. Sometimes (it’s more about younger ladies in their 20s) they can be “too cute” (that’s what they call “amae” or “spoiled-child-behavior”). But it’s not too common today. 

As you see, it’s a very complex subject to discuss. What you need to understand is that there are no women who would be “perfect for everyone” and you always need to weigh the pros and cons carefully—and Japanese women are not an exception. 

How to impress them? 

When it comes to online dating, it’s simple—be respectful, have a good profile, don’t ghost, and so on. As for offline dates, it’s a more complex topic.

Of course, all those traditional tips like “be a gentleman”, “be confident”, and “be honest with her” will work well with any Japanese bride. Just like with almost any other woman in the world. 

So instead of “worldwide” tips, let’s talk about something more local. Something that would work with Japanese ladies perfectly.

• Don’t kiss her in public, especially during several first dates. PDA isn’t forbidden there but there’s a very high chance you will not get what you want and make her embarrassed. And by the way, that’s how it works with all Asian brides, not only with Japanese women.
• Remember that personal time is very important. In Japan, people who are in a romantic relationship are totally ok with spending time on their personal activities. Remember what we said about the importance of silence in their culture? Well, this applies to the relationship, too—both parties understand that “Alone Time” is important and there’s nothing wrong about it. Which means you’ll have to understand and respect that, too.
• Planning a date? Well, plan a long one. They often have full-day dates with all kinds of activities you can imagine, so a 1-hour date will probably not impress them. And remember that they expect foreigners to be more romantic and more confident than local men, which means you’ll need to really plan everything (including romantic surprises) if you want to impress her.

Is it possible to buy a Japanese bride? 

No, of course it’s not possible. You can not buy Japanese wife (or any other wife).

But you can meet thousands of local women online, and these women would be genuinely interested in a relationship with a man from another country. The best place where you can meet them is a mail order bride website (something like SakuraDate), but it’s not the only option you have.

Where to meet Japanese brides? 

Let’s talk about finding a Japanese wife in more detail. Is it actually possible? And what options do you have?

Online

We’re talking about Japan mail order bride websites here. These are dating sites but for international relationships, with more features, better security measures, and more traditional or even marriage-minded users. 

Offline

Japan is one of the most popular mail bride countries, local women love dating foreigners, they’re cute and they seem approachable. Maybe, meeting them offline isn’t a bad idea?

Let’s see.

Marriage agencies

You choose a few ladies from a catalog, exchange several messages, and go to Japan. The agency provides you with a catalog, it has its own online messaging tools, and it will help you arrange a trip to this country. Typically, these agencies provide translation services, plan the dates, book the hotel rooms, etc.

There are real Japanese women for marriage on these catalogs. However, this is only true when we’re talking about legit agencies with a good reputation.	Finding a good agency is difficult. What’s more, the industry of marriage agencies is not even close to the online dating industry so the selection is pretty small.
They can really do everything for you, you just need to relax and enjoy the dates.	Although it’s legal to use such agencies, you need to be ready for even more paperwork when applying for your bride’s visa. You’ll receive RFE (Request for Evidence) and will need to prove the agency is not a marriage broker.
	It’s very expensive. A 1-week trip with all those services included will cost you at least $5,000-$6,000.

See, it’s better not just to seek and date single Japanese women, women who speak English, or those who would like to date a foreigner. It’s better to seek English-speaking Japanese women looking for American men, and if it was a Venn diagram with three circles, the area of overlap on it would not be too considerable. 

Why? Well, mainly because of a very low English proficiency index in Japan and because the Japanese people are pretty conservative and their views on travel and emigration are pretty conservative, as well. So the chances of finding a perfect mail order Japanese bride who would love to leave Japan and marry a foreigner are actually pretty low… Unless you do it online. Mail order bride platforms like SakuraDate are places of concentration for such women, so we don’t just recommend them because they have large dating pools. We recommend these platforms because they have exactly the women you need.

How much does it cost to get a Japanese mail order bride? 

Buying a bride is not possible, as you already know. However, you’ll need to meet her on a dating site, visit her in Japan, get her a visa, and marry her—and each of these steps will cost you a certain sum. 

Let’s be more detailed. Let’s say you’re going to use SakuraDate because it’s one of the most popular Japanese dating apps, but even if you choose another platform, the prices on most dating apps today are about on the same scale.

• Sakuradate has 6 credit packages costing from $13 to $200. 
• The largest one is the best one because the larger the package, the less you pay per 1 credit. 
• If you buy the largest one, you’ll pay $0.2 per credit. 
• Live chat costs 2 credits/minute ($0.4). 
• Sending an email costs 20 credits ($4). 
• Typically, men chat for around 15 minutes per day and send around 10 emails per month. 
• 15 minutes of chat per day is 450 minutes or 900 credits per month ($180). 
• 10 emails per month cost 200 credits ($40). 
• The total cost is $220

As for the trip and visa, it’s simple—you’ll pay around $2,500-$3,000 for a 1-week trip to Tokyo and $2,500 for the visa (and for a green card). 

Calculating the wedding cost is a much more complex task. Thus, the average wedding cost is around $27,000 but it’s the average cost, not the median one—and the median cost is around $10,000. In Japan, it’s $30,000, but a lot of couples spent $15,000 or less on their wedding. As you see, there’s a lot of options—for example, if you don’t want to pay for the reception and the wedding party, you can simply pay around $200 for the registration. This means the total cost of a Japanese bride can vary from $5,500 to $35,000.

Want to know more about the mail order brides cost? Read our guide, we’ve covered every detail there.

What it’s like to be married to a Japanese bride 

Before you actually find Japanese wife, read these three top facts about these women to understand them better!

• They are very loyal. Like, super-loyal. This concept is rooted in their culture, from the loyalty of a samurai to the loyalty of a worker to the company and to the loyalty to a romantic partner.
• They tend to avoid conflicts and be very calm. Remember what we’ve said about harmony? Well, the harmony in the family is extremely important for them. 
• They are hard-working and ambitious, educated and very intelligent. At the same time, they are committed to the role of a wife and a mother very strongly. It’s a perfect balance, something like the one a lot of Ukrainian women somehow achieve.

Why do Japanese girls look for foreign husbands? 

• They think Westerners are more family-centered. Japan has a grave problem with marriages, families, and fertility—so Japanese women who want to build a family often simply can’t find a man who would share these views in their country.
• Some of them want to live in another society, one less dominated by the group identity and more tolerant to those who “stand out”. Japan has a proverb about the nail that sticks out (and gets hammered down) and this is a great explanation of how their society works—a lot of young women don’t agree with this and want to move to a more individualistic country and find a local man to marry.
• Some of them think Western men are more attractive. But it’s not the most common reason, to be honest.
• They want to be treated with respect. We can’t say that they have a serious problem with that in Japan (unlike Thai or Filipino brides) but it still exists and Western men generally treat their women better.

Stereotypes about Japanese brides 

We believe that you’ve heard at least some of them, but even if you don’t, this will be useful for you. Some of these stereotypes are so popular they might affect your expectations indirectly, even if you’ve never heard them from anyone.

“Xenophobic”

The main problem Japanese have with xenophobia is their dislike of Koreans and Chinese. But it’s slowly fading into the past and they certainly don’t have any prejudices against Westerners. 

“Child-free”

Thousands of Japanese people do not want children anymore, that’s a fact. Another fact is that it’s one of the main reasons why Japanese mail order wives search for a foreign husband—because they want a foreign husband to give them what they can’t get in their country. That’s basically how this sphere works and why it’s still on the rise: American men meet foreign ladies because they can’t find family-centered and traditional girls in their country, foreign ladies meet American men because they can’t find marriage-minded and family-centered men in their countries. And Japanese ladies are not an exception. There are a lot of Japanese girls who want to have children, and most of the mail brides are like this.

“Gold-diggers”

They are humble and pretty down to earth. Yes, there’s a stereotype about mail order brides being gold-diggers, but it’s definitely not true—in reality, Japanese women have very realistic expectations and they don’t need a lot of money to be happy. Well, on the other hand, this doesn’t mean they don’t care about it at all—they live in a rich country, most of them are successful, and they obviously want to find a man who would be financially stable. It’s just not their #1 priority.

“Asexual”

This might be true for older generations (those in their 50s and 60s). However, it’s not 100% true when we’re talking about younger Japanese. According to a study, the asexuality level among those in their 20s and 30s is going down.

It’s interesting that stereotypes and myths are not based on nothing, they have pretty clear roots and it’s easy to explain them. Well, now, you know the truth.

Do you still have questions? 

Japanese girls are very special. They’re intelligent and hard-working, they are very interesting to talk to, and very ambitious. But they somehow combine that with their femininity, traditional values—and the result is just impressive.

Now, ask your questions. In the FAQ section, you’ll probably find all the answers.

FAQ